Coming Out Later in Life Group
A Support Group for Women Who Are Coming Out Later in Life (for ages ~35+). Next Group: Late Spring 2025
This coming out support group is designed for socially progressive people who identify as female, non-binary, or cisgender and claim (or grapple with) any of the following labels: lesbian, late bloomer, bisexual, queer, gay, asexual, pansexual, questioning, not sure, et al.
Prospective members of the group have been living their lives in the closet, have recently realized their LGBQ+ identity, currently are or have been living a hetero-normative lifestyle that doesn’t fit their sexual identity, or are in a same-sex relationship and struggling with coming out-related issues.
The group will include problem-solving, coaching, non-judgmental support, strategies, and resources about issues related to coming out. Irene has offered this group many times and updates the information, format, and resources each time so it remains fresh and current.
This is a non-judgmental, confidential, sex-positive group where members will give and receive support. Everyone’s process, stories, and experiences are respected and supported.
This is a list of issues commonly discussed in these coming-out groups. Which ones resonate with you?
- Share your process and concerns in “coming out” to yourself
- Hear from others about their experiences, challenges, successes, and decision-making processes
- Explore how the decisions you may need/want to make may put you in conflict with the needs of your children, spouse, family, friends, religious community, etc.
- “Coming out” to your male partner or spouse, family, and friends
- Currently or recently in a same-sex relationship and dealing with coming-out-related issues
- Dos and Don’ts in “coming out” to your children
- Explore what it means for you to accept, be, and express more fully and authentically who you are
- Identify the values you will use to guide your coming out process
- Decrease isolation, shame, fear, loss, anxiety, and guilt
- Share ideas on how to build connections within the LGBTQ+ communities
- Identify issues related to having lived a single or married “heterosexual life” (e.g., identity, friends, family, years of inter-twined life with a spouse, children, money, workplace, spiritual community, neighbors, schools, mental health & medical professionals, etc.)
- Address internalized homophobia
- Explore how living a hetero-normative life has impacted you
- Explore the intersectional issues of age, race, class, gender, and sexual identity
- Explore stereotypes vs. facts about the LGBTQ+ communities and LGBTQ+ culture
- Explore the concepts of LGBTQ+ culture, including heterosexism, heteronormativity, and heterosexual privilege
- Discuss the decrease in privilege and safety that comes from being LGTBQ+ vs. “straight.”
- Explore the concepts of sexual fluidity, sexuality, sexual identity, and gender identity
- Talk about meeting and dating other queer people and sex.
- Share resources (e.g., books, websites, movies, podcasts, blogs, and resources for yourself and your family members)
- Manage your self-care throughout the process.
- During the group, identify and address a coming-out-related goal for yourself and receive input, support, and guidance.
Format: The groups will include a mix of sharing stories, supporting each other, strategizing, problem-solving, learning, goal-setting, coaching, and resource-sharing. Group members will receive a carefully curated and updated list of resources, definitions, books, blogs, podcasts, etc. The group is confidential. The group will meet on Zoom for 14 consecutive weeks (except holidays). Attendance is expected for each session. This group is not a “drop-in group.” Because the coaching group happens on Zoom, it is open to members who live anywhere. (Since March 2020, I have facilitated several different types of group meetings and trainings over Zoom. Participants have been from many states in the USA, Canada, and the UK.)
Structure & Fee: Each group has a maximum of nine members. The group meetings are $60 each. Two discounted rates are available. These coaching groups are out-of-pocket pay.
Meeting Day and Time: The next 14-week group will start in late spring 2025. It will meet on Thursdays from 430 to 6 p.m. CST. Contact Form – Irene to be added to the waitlist.
Group Member Age Range: The group welcomes women who are in their mid-30s up to their 80s+. The inter-generational age range provides a richer depth of experiences, where the older people learn from the younger members and vice versa.
Next steps: A free 30-minute Zoom intake appointment is required to ensure that the group meets prospective members’ needs and vice versa. Contact Form – Irene to schedule the intake appointment for the next group or to be added to the waitlist.
Individual Coming Out Coaching
In addition to or instead of being added to the group waitlist, if you are interested in doing some individual work related to coming out, I offer this option as well. In one-on-one work, I will share the packet of resources and worksheets that I offer to the members of the coming-out group.
For general information about Irene’s groups
Facilitator information as it pertains to this group: Irene Greene MSED. she/her. Irene provides LGBTQ+ and “coming out” consultation and training to other mental health providers and offers conflict resolution and transition coaching to families and relationships in transition due to “coming out,” separation, co-parenting, and unresolved family-of-origin issues related to trauma and conflict. Irene has been “out” for over 30 years and is the single parent of two adult children, whom she co-parents with her female ex-partner.
The Group is Designed and Facilitated by Irene Greene, MSED. She/Her. Irene is a seasoned group facilitator, mental health provider, LGBTQPIA+ relationship coach, national family conflict coach, and national educator. Over the past twenty-five years, Irene has created and facilitated dozens of groups and trainings on a variety of topics: coming out, general support, moral injury, self-care and wellness, COVID-related self-care for medical and helping professionals, isolation and grief, White allyship, sexual and physical trauma abuse healing, moral injury, burnout, and compassion fatigue. Based in Minneapolis, MN.
Examples of Groups Irene has Trained and Facilitated: Regions Hospital, St. Paul, MN; Denver Health Medical Center, Denver, Colorado; Anatomy Bequest Program, University of Minnesota; MN LGBTQ+ Therapists’ Network; Headway Emotional Health Services, Twin Cities; The University of Minnesota Advising Program: Office of Undergraduate Education; Telling Queer History, Twin Cities; BECAUSE Conference, St. Paul; The University of Minnesota Department of Earth Sciences; Travis County Texas Prosecutor’s Office, Austin Tx; Way to Grow, MN; State Conference for Headway MN; MN Coalition of Sexual Abuse Programs; MN Department of Corrections; Anti-Racism Coalition, New York City; MN Coalition of Domestic Violence, Northstar Street Medics, MN; The Family Tree Clinic, Minneapolis, MN; MN Women in Psychology; Touchstone Mental Health Annual Conference, Minneapolis, MN.
